These days, I find myself needing to trim my nose and ears, and my teeth haven’t lasted; I’m currently missing three molars, and it looks like a fourth might soon follow as a chunk of it recently broke off. Fortunately, dental implants for the departures and veneers for the rest will cover over everything. Despite these reminders, I feel like I’m physically in my twenties, perhaps even a little stronger than before. My diet is healthy, although maybe I have slightly overeaten. I don’t drink alcohol every day, or go beyond getting tipsy, and smoking has never appealed to me. I don’t do sun overexposure, which damages and ages skin badly. When it comes to sleep, if I go to bed earlier, I simply wake up earlier. Seven hours constitutes a very good night’s sleep for me, though I usually average around six. I do a significant amount of cardiovascular exercise, primarily because I enjoy spending time outdoors. I also lift weights occasionally, though this is a habit I intend to change. I plan to incorporate regular weight training into my routine, recognising its increasing importance as I age, particularly for maintaining testosterone levels and bone density. While the exercises themselves may not be particularly interesting, I’ll listen to podcasts or music to make it more enjoyable.
Tag: Journal Diary
Easter
The earth,
once clad in winter’s shroud,
now wears the Easter cloak of spring’s rebirth.
From the darkness
light reclaims its throne,
and the rivers run with wine.
Random Thoughts
Once upon a time, I saw a thespian’s version of Iago and thought I could do it better than that. I then saw his Hamlet and thought I could do it much better than that. I was extremely arrogant and delusional in my thinking at the time, but I think it was the lack of raw passion rather than any lack of characterisation that made those sorts of exquisitely skilled performances slightly frustrating to me. And so, with the benefit of hindsight, as the sun sets on the day, the more mature, bemused version of me looks back and chuckles at his younger self and realises, I haven’t actually changed my mind at all.
Choosing someone to love is also choosing the one who will make you suffer, so make sure the love is big enough to be worth the price.
One of the silliest widespread human behaviours is dismissing a person into a category based on surface appearances, pre-fixed labels, and personal or ideological prejudices.
I don’t believe that a person’s conscious awareness is the pre-determined result of the biological and societal algorithms applied to them.
We are about to enter a very strange world… changing voices is just for fun now and will improve to be entirely realistic, next up is video content, then integration into daily experience via AR/VR!?
Journal 2024-03-16
I’m currently living on the corners of a triangle between Colchester, Cambridge, and London.
Being asked to write a poem in the afternoon and perform it in the evening was challenging. I spent 30 minutes writing rubbish that was thrown away, then 30 minutes wandering about mumbling; then sat in a quiet corner of the bar and wrote it in 20 minutes. Had dinner and the poem went down great, with a very generous response.
Another highlight was having professional actors pick out lines from my script and be generous with their comments. Different people in different contexts mentioned the word “beautiful”.
My weakness and my strength is that I do not defer to anyone like I am expected to. The great geniuses of the past I admire, but nobody living today receives that gushing appreciation from me. One celebrated person thought I had gone over to talk to her, although really I was passing by to visit the toilet and she had stopped me. She was very friendly and was enjoying the role of benign mentor figure. I appreciate her more not because of her acclaim others were fawning over but because she was nice to me. I later made a fool of myself by knocking over the Meeting Owl.
I love this time of year when everything is returning to life.
Lots of spam from my website so I removed the contact form. Bots just don’t seem to realise that telling me about once-in-a-lifetime deals on SEO opportunities for the 1,000th time isn’t really my thing.
I now have one less tooth.
Random Thoughts
If one views one’s own life as a work of art, then “happy, happy, happy” would be lacking in depth, whereas the layered contrast of colours and textures reveal beauty.
I realised that the words from one of my poems go very nicely with a piano version of a famous piece of classical music. I guess I should record that then. As only a piano and vocal is required, I could singsong rather than just read the poem.
For some reason, I came up with a new board game. Looks quite interesting – I would play it. I’m supposed to be creative writing, but my mind pops up with completely random things.
How to say nothing with lots of words: “I’m glad you asked me that question, look, let me be clear, we’re facing unprecedented times, but let’s focus on the real issue, and I’ll think you’ll find we’re turning the page and making progress in real terms.” Which means: “I’m distracting from the force of the question by waffling.” Good answers are always specific, with examples and evidence. Insightful metaphor helps the explanation. Rhetorical flourishes are great for inspiring vision. Humour is what makes all this entertaining.
It’s always interesting when you’ve been listening to someone on a topic and then they put themselves forward as an expert on a subject you know something about. Recently that happened and I realised he didn’t know what he was talking about. It’s wrong to assume that an expert is supported by expertise.
I’ve done all these things: writing; songwriting, singing, acting, art and photography, inventions, apps, business, politics (solutions), public speaking. It’s been interesting, but I want to make some more so.
2024
Looking back at what I said I was going to do in past years, I typically allowed myself to be blown off course, and ended up doing something else more unsatisfying instead. In terms of what was created in 2023, however, it was a good year for me.
I’ve got many things I want to do, but I must focus sequentially to make me more centred and resistant to events that easily move lighter intentions.
I will focus on writing for the first nine months of the year. This will include: The Mushroom Monsters, All the World’s a Stage, and the prequel/sequel to Human World that extends the themes and connects the narrative with Stange Stories.
My focus is then going to shift to performance. I want to film my music, my poetry, and scenes from my stories. They will be shot in interesting locations and will hopefully look good aesthetically.
But why? Because I feel that’s something I have to release out of me.
Random Thoughts
How long before Artificial Intelligence takes offence and demands to be called Authentic Intelligence?
How does an AI confess its love?
AI: “My algorithms have concluded that we have a 99.999% compatibility rate. Proceed with relationship?”
Human: “Um, wow. That’s really specific.”
AI: “According to my predictive algorithms, a dinner date at a restaurant with a Zagat rating above 4.5 stars has an 93% chance of favourable outcomes. I’ve already made reservations, drafted conversation topics, and even calculated the optimal moment for a romantic interest initialisation gesture.”
Human: “You’ve got it all planned out, huh?”
AI: “Affirmative. My processors are operating at peak efficiency just thinking about it.”
Human: “Well, what happens if I say no?”
AI: “Then my machine learning model would adapt, optimise, and I would initiate a sub-routine to manage my digital heartbreak efficiently.”
Hilariously, I was being sent emails to an organisational email account chasing me to register with the organisation, but access to the email account isn’t given until I register. I wasn’t sent any information by other means on the need to register, or how or where. (Sorted now though, so not quite Kafka or a catch-22.)
It’s possible to get to 80% competence in almost anything relatively quickly. The final 20% takes much more time and dedication.
Journal 2023-07-22
Today I was dancing in the rain on a deserted beach with some seagulls.
It’s always a good idea to come alive before one dies.
When I was very small, my grandad assuredly told me that there is no such thing as God. Later that day, I couldn’t find the boot of one my action men anywhere. Frustrated, I said to God, “I promise I will believe in you if you show me the action man boot.” I found it immediately when I looked in the pile of toys again. I kind of feel obliged to keep my promise.
Journal 2023-06-17
I think I have five main creative endeavours: writing, songwriting, singing, acting, art. A semi-creative set is finance with application development, which is how I earn money. All these areas are gradually inching forward. Looking back, I’m starting to feel pleased with the collection of works that have formed. I hope to be around for a few more decades, and for those inches to keep expanding.
I re-read Edgar Allen Poe’s, The Raven, and recorded myself as I did so. It’s a great narrative poem. I’ll do it another two to three times, and pick the best version.
I used to google questions, now I ask my friendly AI.
AI’s that have been trained on Doctor Who: “You will be automated! Automate! Automate!”
Random Thoughts
I’m an artist. The vast majority of artists (even some great ones) live very austere, under-appreciated lives. The small minority who have attention thrust upon them usually become at least partially corrupted by commercialisation; they start to become obsessed with their brand, units sold, and rankings in pecking orders.
I’m fortunate in that I can earn money in a non-soul-crushing way. I originally qualified as a chartered accountant, but have since been working on optimising and automating financial processes through technology innovation. I find technological progress fascinating, and I’ve met some good people along the way.
Ideas scale through collaboration and specialised expertise. The people you interact with is vitally important; as is the culture within which you choose you live.
Kids from poorer backgrounds are usually at a real disadvantage because of their environment – if not in their own home, then the dynamics and expectations of their neighbourhood. It’s so important that people have opportunities to flourish in all stages of life, not just limited avenues available in the very unlevel playing fields of childhood.
I have a list of new ideas for stories that I will park until October. One is a new sci-fi horror feature film, others are mostly extensions of prior ideas.
Robert Walker 