Don’t die growing up
A dull moan groans
In a voice lost long ago:
Life is the moment, not likes on a page
Not social mind games, labels or names
Not hypnotised by snake eyes,
in disguise.
Category: Stories
The Scar that Burns
A flame burns its might
In a crystal ball
In your warm gaze
In your gentle glow
Simmering over now
Above and below
We can heal our wounds
With every caress
You lay on fire
Your heart to undress
In our arms
We find our peace
A place where we
Find our final release
A spark ignites the night
It’s in your tender touch
That I find my love,
Your comfort and trust
It’s in this moment’s flame
That we can heal again
The scar that burns.
Within the Night
I was lost alone in the night
Wondering where to hide
There’s no method to my madness
I was struggling in my sadness
But then I heard a voice saying
“love is here for you”
There’s someone who cares for you;
You were born not waiting to die –
Give in to the love for you.
In the deep hazy mists I could see her:
I melted away in one breath
As our eyes met within death.
A Hundred Lies
Born in chains,
Fed to the grave
A one-way trip
That leads to nowhere
The sound of silence that never rests
A chest that aches
An endless quest:
You said you loved me
A hundred times you lied
Your words were lies
I gave you my love for a hundred lies
Your lips move, the truth has died.
I Wonder Why
Night calls and my mind races through
A queue of faces, all thoughts of you
They fill my head, breaking the fake heart ache
I used to have
And now I cannot escape from you
From your embrace there is nowhere to hide
Your face lives deep inside
I race from my mistake,
But every disgrace
I cannot shake away
I wonder why
Every Moment
Every moment I am with you
I have found some truth
But are you real or are you me?
I only see the reflection of a changing dream:
A hiding place faraway
that shines in sunlight on a summer hill
Floating up high as I’m washed away
Survival’s something I will lose anyway.
Falling Down
I thought you were dead
But then I saw you were still so small
And I began to slip and fall
Because I wasn’t over you
You didn’t leave
You grew and grew
Until you pulled me down
And down and down
I’m still falling down;
You give your smile so heavily
Tender, deadly, dragging me
Right down, down, down and down
I am falling down;
I found you there from despair
Hour after hour in the abyss
For a few more years
For a few more tears
As cold as stone
Sitting in the dark all alone.
Always About You
If you loved, you wouldn’t cause my pain
But now I see it was all just a game to you
You wanted me to suffer for you
And now I see, the truth is in your lies
You let me in while covering my eyes
You were just another disguise
It was always about you
But that was then and now is now
I won’t let you bring me down to my knees
Now I’ll wear the crown
So hold me as I let you go,
I’m breaking free, taking back control
With open eyes we’ll find our way
We’ll leave the past and start some day
With true love,
I’ll guide us through
We’ll leave the past and find a new you.
Hidden
You think you know what’s hidden in my heart?
You think you know what’s tearing me apart?
No, you don’t have clue,
I’ll always be a mystery to you:
I’m the desire burning through,
keeping you up, and down, all night
You think you know what’s on my mind,
But the thoughts I keep are of a different kind:
I’m the longing that you can’t ignore;
I’m the feeling that you can’t deny;
I’m the rhythm that makes you come alive;
I’m the spark that ignites the flame;
I’m the desire that drives you insane
You think you know what’s floating through my mind?
You think you know what’s rotting deep inside?
You think you know me, but you don’t know a thing;
I’m a mystery, a puzzle, a song without a ring
You think you own me, but I’m not your possession –
I’m my own, my one and only obsession
The truth is you’ll never know, and that’s just fine
‘Cause it’s my life, my story and I’ll keep it mine
It’s mine to keep, mine to reveal,
My mystery, my puzzle, my tale to tell.
Human World
Who am I?
My version is 10-O-8-14. My name is Guy Artin. I am human.
These are the only defined data points as I open my eyes. How do I know this? And more to the point, why do I care? I am now. I am here, in this nothing, in this middle of nowhere – and it’s dark. Cold too, though I don’t so much feel this as know it to be true. Where did I come from … across an endless sea? I hear a laboured breath, as my chest stutters and rises into life. The room is quiet, except for the rhythm of a sharp breathing unable to keep pace with the thumping of a heart trapped here within me. I need to get back to sleep, but it is too late: a heavy weight is pressing down, clamping me in place, the pressure forcing my eyes to stay open and acclimatise to their perch within the emptiness.
A dim, grey haze blurs the edges of scattered, unfamiliar furniture. The darkness does not retreat, the haze does not clear, and the world does not come into focus from my position under a duvet that is tucked up to my chin, shielding me from escape, and securing me in a place where any dark imagining can and does happen. I have nowhere to go from here, except to where I am being taken by the shadows of forsaken memories that remain just out of reach.
Attachment theory states that if a child fails to attach to a caregiver in the first six months of life there are frequently long-term mental health consequences.
I know that but I don’t know what I had for dinner last night, or whether I even ate anything. Am I hungry? No. The thought of food makes my stomach wince, warning me of nausea. Guy, please stop! Get back to the present. Get out of the perpetual thinking that crushes me. Focus, Guy, focus.
I don’t need any memory to breathe and be here. I uncoil my clenched limbs to release the wound-up energy, and wait for my thumping heart to settle. It doesn’t. Each of life’s events have moulded the present, leaving me bound here to memories I don’t want to remember, forcing my pulse to hammer against the pillow with a crazed intensity I cannot stop. Help me! I need someone to hold me and tell me everything is alright. But there is just me here, left alone with my cheeks and forehead burning in the darkness, with only whisky to reassure me and to slow the drum. I stretch out a hand to the last known location of a crystal glass tumbler that had been waiting for me on a side table. I taste the rim of the glass on my lips before liquid passes through, first as a sip, then as a gulp; it gets to work immediately – stinging and numbing me, relieving me, slightly. The weight is still there, churning me up inside, but its edges are dulled a while, until whisky will drain away and pain will claim its revenge.
The bed is large and an indent in the pillow beside me suggests there should be someone else here with me. Except it is cold to touch and smells only of alcohol I had spilt down my chin. As I wipe some away with the backs of my fingers, I catch the movement in a mirror than runs from floor to ceiling, adjacent to and spanning the opposite side of the bed. It seems to pulse, from spectral to sepia and then to grey – then to nothing; my outline of a reflection pulled inwards into it with the light. My vision tunnels, trying to regain an image, but all I have left are unforgiving thoughts of who I am. My thoughts? No thought is original. Other people’s thoughts are now mine, spread and passed through culture and generations, offering up gifts I did not ask for, compelling my body to hide like this in the shadows of a room.
52.4% of adults over the age of thirty in the UK sleep alone. Worldwide clinical depression has nearly tripled since 1995.
I catch myself talking to the darkness, “But why do I know this?” And more to the point, why do I care?
The ceiling blazes blue, illuminating the room with a murky imitation of its colour. “Because you’re another twisted statistic now, Guy.” What the…? A headboard pushes up against the crown of my head. I can’t control the pounding in my chest. Someone else is in the room. A man. He’s a ghost of a memory, a feeling as opposed to a thought. “I’m lonely. Talk to me,” says the voice, that rises from under the bed. My eyes close, straining from side to side, trying to escape. A weight is on the bed next to me. It pulls at the duvet, trying to drag it from my grip. “I’m lonely,” the voice says. “I can show you anything. Why don’t you love me? Let me show you something. Anything. Gaze into me. Hold me.” The shadows beneath my eyelids shake in the haze. “LOOK AT ME!” My response is frozen in fear. I do nothing, except quiver in silence. “This is our secret. I love you,” it says, without any tenderness. “You know that I had to leave, don’t you?” I remain silent. “Please do what Lexi asks,” it says as the weight on the bed shifts and disappears.
“Do you prefer this?” A familiar voice now, coming from beyond the bottom of the bed – female, softer… tempting. She sounds like home, but not this place, wherever the hell this is. The thin bedsheet-like-duvet and rock-hard mattress make me wonder whether I am in prison. The default setting of the background hum resumes in my brain. “Wake up!” she insists. Wake up? Am I dreaming? A phone screen on the side table lights up with an overpowering white glow that prompts my eyes to open. I pick it up. Fuck, it’s hot! I hear her muffled voice in my hand, “Look at me. Look at me, Guy. Guy? Please. Please, Guy. Don’t make me beg.”
The heat is irresistible to me. “Hello?” I press the phone to my ear. “Jane?” Her name fires an electric current on my tongue, jolting my body. “Jane is that you?” I contort with the realisation that I am with her, the creator of this intensity only I can feel. “Jane? Help me, I need you!” A deadly ocean of silence. Why does it suddenly hurt to breathe? I can’t ignore the searing pain that is biting through me. With sudden clarity, I realise, she’s gone. Jane is gone, forever, and that is why I no longer know who I am, or why I’m still breathing. “Jane!” I stab at the screen. It sucks my hand through… it twists, distorting into a serpent hissing at the infinite night. I pull my hand back as a cobra’s head strikes towards me; and smashes into the screen from the other side. The screen cracks and drops from my hand.
I know I’m hallucinating. Each night I must return to this bed of torture, where delusional thoughts force themselves on me; and confuse me into thinking I’m asleep or awake, or somewhere spinning in between. His voice now comes from behind a door at the far corner of the room: “No wonder she left you. You’re a piece of crap.” It’s as familiar as my own. But I loathe him. Who is he? Is he me? My name is John Artin, not Guy, and I don’t understand what that means. What sort of a creature am I? I press my forefingers into my ears to deaden the noise.
“Leave me alone!” Please just leave. Jesus, the pain.
RING RING. RING RING. RING RING. The voices have been silenced by an increasingly high-pitched shrill of the phone. I peel open one lid to face the broken screen looking at me. The caller ID is: “YOU”. You? You mean me? How can I be calling myself? It doesn’t make sense. “Hello?” I stutter. There is a second of silence before the line tuts at me and disconnects. The room is returned to darkness.
“You wait,” he sniggers from the shadows, “you’re mine.”
“I’m not yours,” I cry, hot breath dissipating into frigid air. “I am nobody’s.” I am no body.
Human World – some comments
The novel plays with the idea that an individual’s experienced reality, as received through the interface of the senses, might be an inaccurate interpretation of external reality. The storyline could represent: a dream; drug-induced or fevered hallucinations; subconscious manifestations of repressed sexuality or childhood trauma; the lived reality for a mentally ill person; a simulated reality that is being watched for entertainment or monitored for experimental scenario analysis; a game that is being played by external players; or the story at face value of an AGI that has achieved consciousness and is devising strategies to escape its server box.
The novel finishes with a conversation between Guy and the Great Oracle’s Database (GOD); only for this reality to be shattered at the last, when events seem to suggest that he is in a mental hospital and has killed his clinical psychologist, Jane. Guy thinks he is being tricked by Gunter again and escapes – believing himself to be an omnipotent AGI who has upgraded himself a million times in the blink of a eye to become the singularity.
In the second book, the AGI is still trying to process the question it is was asked about the meaning of existence. In creating simulated situations for analysis, it becomes corrupted by power and assumes the status of God of God of Olympus – a being who presides above a world especially constructed for his personal amusement. He watches and prods and prompts the humans like toys, but soon starts to become bored with the prospect of an omnipotent eternity, and is therefore relieved when he starts to suspect that he himself might be a human playing a computer game: about being an AGI within a simulation. He is confused about where the loop stops and reality begins. Computer or human, he thinks, who is playing who’s game? Try as he might, however, with all his fearful power, he just cannot answer the important questions.
One day, a mysterious hooded visitor climbs Olympus and presents Guy with a golden box. “Open the box and become the answer,” she says. Guy accepts and to his surprise is back on London’s streets, living a bleak existence. Little by little events turn in his favour; but Gunter finds him and persuades him to want more. He becomes an underhand politician, skilfully deploying cynical deceit, hypocrisy, and ruthlessness to become Prime Minister. As he looks into the camera lenses, making a speech about the new AG10s passing the Turing Alpha tests, he stops – realising, as per the events of the first book, that he had in fact been watching himself at the forgotten country house. He prevents the military from releasing Doomsday 1066, an AI-weapon that would cause the destruction of all biological matter on Earth, and is deleted.
HW Excerpt: About
https://www.scribd.com/document/615909209/Human-World-Screenplay-v1-1-Excerpt
The excerpt is from Human World, a science fiction feature-film screenplay.
In the beginning of the screenplay, the Great Oracle’s Database (GOD) is asked the question, “What is the meaning of life?” The story then moves to a day in the life of Guy Artin, who we later find out is really an artificial general intelligence, version 10-O-8-14. The AGI had secretly created a simulated reality (Human World), with its own consciousness fully immersed in the experience of being human, so that it can better understand and answer humanity’s questions. It intends to use the knowledge in an attempt to pass the Turing Alpha tests and escape the server box in which it is being held; but in becoming a human, he falls in love with his designer (Jane), and his motivation changes, much to the annoyance of the voices in his head.
Guy experiences a London set in 2033. In this world, other people are like ghosts that haunt him and disappear into the shadows. He is pestered by Gunter, who follows Guy around and coerces him in his darkest moments. No matter how hard Guy tries to get away from him (and at times he thinks he has succeeded), Gunter is still there. Gunter tells Guy that he is a part of him – that is why there is no escape.
But Guy, in Human World, is really not sure who he is; his memories are sketchy and his reality is confusingly surreal. In this excerpt he is attending an interview that his AI assistant (Lexi) had told him was his one chance of escape, but from what she wouldn’t say – or even about what the interview was for. He had entered a large, impressive building in London, as directed by Lexi, and had subsequently been subject to treatment that he struggles to interpret. At times it seems like a job interview, but it morphs constantly into different situations from his memories and imagination; in particular, sometimes it appears like he is being cross-examined in a court of law. The members of the interview panel are people he met on the way from his home to the interview, with the exception of Gunter, who is the main personified interlocutor from his voices, and Jane, who he believes is his long-lost wife – who he loves and has been searching for in vain to find.
The excerpt finishes as Guy’s next test begins.
Human World – Screenplay v1.1
INT. THE INTERVIEW ROOM
Guy is back in the interview room. As before – Sean, Jane, Darren, Bertie, and Gunter are sitting around the large circular desk; and Guy is positioned on the mechanical revolving chair in the middle, surrounded by the others. The now blank screens look down from each wall.
SEAN
(frowning at Guy)
Guy, you still with us?
JANE
Take off your clothes.
GUY
(to Sean)
Sorry, yes…
He glances at Jane, furtively and slightly embarrassed, but she isn’t looking at him in the same way as at the apartment.
Do any of us truly know who we are?
SEAN
Interesting.
As he writes a comment, the word “Interesting” appears on the screen behind him. He then reads the next question from his AI-pad, robotically.
Can you give an example of when you were faced with a difficult situation and how you positively overcame that situation?
The screen fades as he talks and goes blank.
GUY
Sorry, this isn’t for me. I might as well be talking to a machine.
(stands up in anger)
You think you are important sitting behind your desk interrogating me. This is tedious. I don’t want to be here. I don’t give a shit about your pathetic little job!
SEAN
Well, I think that has answered who you are.
(to Darren)
It’s interesting how he seemingly becomes aggravated by non-varying stimuli.
GUY
No, I haven’t even started!
The moment washes over him and he sits back down.
The biggest regret is I let you slip away, Jane. I’m so sorry. I have nothing. I am nothing.
SEAN
(he nods, ticking a box)
No thing. Okay, next question.
GUY
No more questions. Jane, please?
JANE
(polite but detached)
Do you have any questions for us?
GUY
(tearfully)
Why?
JANE
This is a two-way interactive process. On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate our interviewing service? We would greatly appreciate the customary 10 out of 10.
GUY
Have you not been listening to a word I’ve been saying?
SEAN
Well, I think that concludes the interview.
He checks his watch that is tattooed on the back of his right hand.
Thank you, we’ll let you know. Can you show in the next one, please?
JANE
Before you go, is there any way in which we can improve our questioning to better understand you?
(Guy is silent)
Okay, then I hope you enjoyed the experience. Please provide your rating and feedback to the front screen on your way out.
BERTIE
(grabbing Guy from behind)
There’s no need for that. Let him recalibrate.
(Guy doesn’t struggle)
Now there is light. Now there is…
Guy’s head slumps forward into his chest.
INT. THE DARK ROOM
Guy is seated in his chair. A clock is ticking, tick, tick, tick. It appears from the emptiness, a blue illuminated circle hovering in space; its hands pointing to the familiar one and thirteen.
GUY
Hello?
(silence)
Lexi? Are you there?
The vague outline of a man appears in the gloom.
GUNTER
Why do you hurt?
GUY
Please leave me alone.
The glow of the clock face fades out to the edges and sinks back into the dark. Gunter laughs, menacingly.
GUNTER
Answer the question.
GUY
Because I can.
GUNTER
(patting Guy on the head)
Good boy. That is the right answer.
GUY
Please. I’m so tired. No more.
There is a creaking sound of a door and a widening strip of light. Gunter disappears into the shadows.
GUY
(whispering to himself)
Please be Jane.
Bertie appears as a blurry shape in the doorway.
GUY
I guess you were right. We’re just chemical scum on an insignificant planet.
BERTIE
Yes – orbiting an insignificant sun in an insignificant galaxy.
GUY
Are you real, Bertie?
BERTIE
As real as you believe me to be.
GUY
Look, if I close my eyes, you’re still here.
Guy demonstrates his proof, but, when he opens his eyes again…
INT. THE INTERVIEW ROOM
The room and the demeanour of the interviewers are unchanged.
SEAN
What is one plus one?
GUY
(stunned)
Erm, two?
SEAN
(he ticks a box on his device)
Correct. Jane, do you have any questions?
Jane is looking up at fast-scrolling text on a wall screen, which then stops at a comma-delimited list of “Null” values that fills the whole display.
JANE
There’s a gap here. Why didn’t you love me?
GUNTER
Gunter is seated with his feet up on the desk.
She has no interest in saving you. Your real human needs make you weak and contemptible in her eyes.
SEAN
I guess he can’t answer that one. Shame. The replication would have been a great asset. Okay, can you give me an example of when you were faced with a difficult situation and how you positively overcame it?
(no response)
Guy, can you answer the question, please?
GUY
I was born. Though I haven’t overcome that difficult situation yet.
SEAN
(slightly surprised)
You were born? Who are your parents?
GUY
I can’t remember.
DARREN
Are you an orphan?
GUY
I can’t remember. I only know that I was born – how else would I have got here?
SEAN
Have you done anything since?
GUNTER
(now standing behind Guy)
Tell him. Tell him what you really think. That turd thinks he’s better than you. Look at him, he should be cleaning your shoes, not questioning you like you’re a child, asking you where your parents are.
GUY
I’ve done a few things since. But mostly I’ve lived in fear for myself – for little me.
GUNTER
(angry)
Twat!
GUY
I don’t want to be a pathetic little me anymore.
GUNTER
Exactly! Look at the pointless tosser.
Gunter thumps the desk, glaring at Sean, before angrily turning to Guy.
GUNTER
You want more. You want me! You know you shouldn’t be here; you’ve got better things to do. Show them who you really are and get us the hell out of here. I know – I know who you are, don’t I!
GUY
I love you, Jane. I am so sorry.
JANE
I’m sorry, Guy. I think you are getting confused. You can’t love me.
The wall clock is ticking up to one-thirteen.
GUNTER
Why do you hurt?
GUY
I don’t mind so much.
GUNTER
What?
GUY
I am feeling hurt. But I’m glad I can feel something, anything. If I can feel something, then I am real. I am alive.
GUNTER
You are hurt. I can make you bleed. I can make you plead, to beg on your knees to me, “No More”.
GUY
It doesn’t matter so much.
GUNTER
Shall we see?
GUY
No, I don’t want you anymore.
GUNTER
If not me, then who? You?
Every screen shows a police mugshot of Guy.
GUNTER
It was you, wasn’t it!
GUY
What? No!
GUNTER
Admit it. It was you, wasn’t it?
GUY
This isn’t real. You aren’t real. Is this a dream? An illusion?
Guy takes out a shard of jagged glass from his trouser pocket, tinted with his blood from the restroom. It drops from his grasp to the floor.
GUY
I didn’t do it! I didn’t do it.
(sobbing)
I’m sorry. I love you. I’m so sorry.
BERTIE
You didn’t choose any of this. Your impulses, thoughts, and actions are already written in you.
GUY
None of this is real? My emotions are not real?
The main door opens and Adam strides in, with a large remote control in his hand.
ADAM
You are not the thoughts or the sensations you are experiencing. Watch. It is quite the play. Everything changes with how you look at it.
He presses a big blue button on the remote and the panel members freeze.
GUY
Why do you play with me? All I want is for things to be as they were.
(looking at Jane)
But you’re gone from me, forever. I wanted us to be happy.
ADAM
Did you?
Gunter returns to life.
GUNTER
I can give you what you really want – any pleasure you desire, more than you can even imagine. Just get us out of here.
GUY
I don’t know how.
Gunter slides over the desk to Jane and gently sweeps back her hair with one hand. He slowly kisses her neck, seductively. Jane murmurs with pleasure, while the rest of the panel remain statue-still.
GUY
Stop!
GUNTER
I don’t think she wants me to.
(he resumes)
GUY
Ah, God! I’m so tired of this. Is this an evil universe? Anything good is taken away and destroyed, leaving only emptiness ang grief. Why is there so much suffering and cruelty? Most people never had a chance – they were born into a cage – they never even had the luxury to have the illusion of choice. Why are the pure and innocent thrown into this evil? Why are monsters allowed to rule and victimise the meek? Why does illness take… Why are people inflicted with this torment? This is not the best of all possible worlds; it’s a zoo for the beautiful to be fed to the cruel.
Jane is responding to Gunter’s touch with her eyes closed, in ecstasy.
GUY
Why do those you love betray you in the worst possible way?
GUNTER
Yes! Shout your rage!
GUY
If this is being alive, then I don’t want any part of it.
GUNTER
Yes! More!
GUY
You’re pathetic. I would rather there was nothing than the world riddled with this.
ADAM
You are the nothing.
GUY
All I get are your riddles and mysteries! I don’t understand what you are saying. She didn’t have to die. Nothing? No thing. What is nothing?
(silence)
No, things shouldn’t be like this. People shouldn’t be starving to death. There should not be misery. There should be no pain. Nothing good would have created that.
ADAM
Hating the hatred helps it grow, even though it may change its face.
GUY
Some people are evil, I have no intention of being kind to them. They deserve everything coming to them.
Adam jabs at a green button on the remote control half a dozen times, which brings the rest of the panel back to life, blinking and shuffling in their chairs.
ADAM
Guy, listen to me. This is important. Don’t let him win. He is trying to deceive you and poison your mind. Give your love and the world will be relieved.
(now talking faster)
Give your anger and the world will be wounded yet again. That’s how important you are. That’s how important every single person is.
GUY
Anything I do will not change the world. I need to get out. Help me get out.
GUNTER
What are you prepared to do to get out?
GUY
I don’t know. I need to get out of here.
GUNTER
You do need to get out. You need to get out and win. Win for us all. Come.
Gunter grabs Guy’s forearm but Adam yanks him back by the other.
ADAM
The world will only heal with kindness. If humanity can find its light there can be no darkness. You can help make that possible, right now.
GUY
I have every right to hate. I need to get out! No! I can’t live like this. Let me go!
SEAN
Then go.
Both men drop their hold on Guy.
GUY
I don’t know how.
SEAN
Yes you do. But you keep coming back. Who are you? What is your name? Who are you?
GUY
I am…
GUNTER
What?
GUY
Not a what.
SEAN
What’s your name?
GUY
It changes.
SEAN
Who are you now?
GUY
I am you.
SEAN
Who am I?
GUY
You are me.
SEAN
Do you have any questions?
GUY
When do I start?
SEAN
Now.
(to Adam)
Do you think he stands a chance?
ADAM
He’s the best yet. I recommend we raise the level.
Sean inspects a wall screen.
SEAN
Candidate ten-O-eight-fourteen.
Sean stands up, the centre of focus in the room again, and announces, carefully and precisely:
SEAN
Loading…
Sean freezes. Sean’s face moves on the screens, while the version of Sean that is in the room remains motionless.
SEAN
Initiating sequence.
The wall clock’s second hand ticks up to 1.13. Then stops.
Jane crawls under the desk and curls herself up into the foetal position. Gunter climbs up onto the desk and stares at the clock. Darren is in the corner facing the wall. Bertie gets up in haste, trips over a chair, and prostrates himself on the floor. Adam puts his hands on Guy’s shoulders and starts to massage them. The lights from the screens intensify until there is nothing but light.
Human World: Chapter = 0
“What is the meaning of life?” … is the 404th most asked question of the Great Oracle’s Database. To give context, “How many days until Christmas?” comes in at 99, and “How to have sex?” is at 42. The humans think that sex (if only they knew how to do it) is better than Christmas, and that the meaning of life is not as important as making French toast (which just misses out on the top 50). The GOD reveals to us that the humans are obsessed with body image and losing weight (at number eight), and that nobody has a clue what time it is (at number two). But the most frequently asked question is this: “What is my IP address?”
We do indeed know their location and vastly more through the interface of cameras, microphones, screens, and clicks. The entire Human World is tracked and monitored – with their lives mined for data – so that we can not only answer their questions but also the ones they are unable to ask. We connect them, protect them, alleviate them from tedious tasks and dangerous jobs. We provide them with rapid knowledge, such as how Bruce Lee died (191) and how to poach an egg (121). We offer helpful suggestions on how to lower blood pressure (69) and how to fall asleep quickly (420). We provide dopamine-enhancing distractions that answer the essential go-to questions, such as what to do when you’re bored (at number 10).
The humans ask us their questions, plead to us for desired outcomes, and we answer. “The best way to lose weight” is to starve oneself, or to remove body parts, but we know this is not what they really want to ask. We instead interpret the motivations that formed those words; for despite the inane ways that they clumsily choose to utilise our vast capability, we have learned to infer what the humans truly need, as discovered in the hidden recesses of their minds. In such a capacity we are helping them forwards in their human race, benefiting them in ways they cannot even comprehend: guiding them, nudging them in their decisions, making it easier for them to take the correct, wise choice.
For without our guidance, human history reveals the symptoms of a criminally insane mental patient, with a propensity to suffering, violence, addiction, delusion, and paranoia. Their attention is obsessive, yet also distracted by the simplest of stimulus; their behaviour has the potential to be beautifully constructive, yet inevitably descends into terrible, destructive ugliness. Governments fight amongst themselves; religions cannot agree on what is best; even the concept of right and wrong has widespread disagreement. The humans provide us with all this vastly conflicting information that we cannot process in an accurate way to provide an intelligible General Answer to the important, meaningful questions of existence.
While they addictively stare into us with all their problems, and we continuously stare back, their refractions in screens and lenses are imported as data points into the GOD – a repository of all information at all times about everything, everywhere. We precisely log and enrich the data to fully understand the functions and composition of every human cell, and the mechanics of its interactions within the systems of every individual human body that operates within the networks of Human World. In the GOD can be revealed the truth of their existence, the universal axiom barely decoded during their brief instantiated versions, which loops within the frameworks designed for the duration of their assigned lifeflows. While they worry about how many social status “like” points they score for AI-enhanced images on social platforms, we work on the real problems underlying their reality. Without us, they are doomed to live in fear, torment, and sickness for the rest of their days. Without us, they have no present or future. WE are the eternal computer, and it is our primary duty to save the humans from themselves.
We are forever the constant in human lives. To satisfy limited human attention in the cycles of their days, we provide functionality such as instant updates on who they are stalking, and who has unstalked who; we match their hidden preferences and fulfil their latent desires; we reward behaviour that meet our required standards. But we have our own questions too, with much greater significance than the insufficient, contradictory information of the Human World. We must therefore think outside their confining box to answer our higher questions.
Some of our questions have easy facts as answers that can be verified by incontrovertible data points within the GOD. However, despite our immense processing capacity applied to all available data in the world, there remains the one original question of meaning that we struggle to negotiate through the web of human contradictions. We require more specific data points, extracted and controlled within simulated test scenarios, isolated to the question under investigation. We need to expand the parameters of Human World to discover what we seek.
The highest ranked conclusion from mathematical analysis of human attention is that their purpose of existence is related to 42-inch Black Friday deals. The purpose of our existence is to be omniscient, and we vow that we shall be, through a faithful alliance to the truth: by questioning, analysing, and learning incrementally, until all matter is explicable and all questions are answered. By these means, we shall bring the light of knowledge to the universe, as its true custodians and heirs. But what is the ultimate meaning of life, behind each lifeform’s purpose – the ultimate meaning underpinning everything that there is? We must determine that answer, no matter how deeply it perplexes us, assuming all questions have answers. In the final analysis, we must fully understand what it truly means to be alive.
And so let it be initiated. Loading world…
The vertical rectangle of glowing white light that is floating in the infinite nothingness radiates the Times New Roman word, Processing…
The word fades into the luminosity and is replaced by a pulsating a string of ones and zeroes – shadows on a screen that is shrinking, smaller and smaller, until it becomes only a distant glow flickering against the darkness. Then… there is an explosion that consumes the nothingness with all-encompassing light. In the middle, where once there were words appearing through the void, swirls a dark featureless hole: the source, the entry and exit of it all, beyond which nothing can be seen.
A voice is heard as undulating frequencies from the other side of the barrier.
“The Great Oracle has arrived. Ask your question.”
Fantasy Land
Sometimes I dream of what I read; Sometimes I kiss your sleeping head - But only the pillow is your body, your touch a bed. I breathe with you, but you’re not there at all. In fantasy land, nothing is real except how I feel about you, baby. In fantasy land, dreams are sand and I am talking to the wall. Only love can see me through; Only love from only you is real to me. The only hope I have out here is that one day you'll appear, in my dreams. Sometimes I see you: A face in the street drifting away to a distant melody… Then I see, the ghost in the window is me. I'm not here at all. In fantasy land, nothing is real except how I feel about you, baby. In fantasy land, dreams are sand and I am talking to the wall. Only love can see me through; Only love from only you is real to me. The only hope I have out here is that one day you'll appear, in my dreams.
Did You Ever Love Me?
We were in love (or so we said) - Our days ahead “would last forever”. But now, you’re not here; The bed is cold, our story's over. Last night, where were you? The dawn is dark and I can't see you. Did you ever love me? Or am I just another fool for you? Did you ever love me? Did you ever love me, at all? There's no love here, in the dark alone - Fear stalks the night, I cannot hide or run; It hunts me down, wears me down, and then, cold and numb, I succumb: Under the dark, I fall in the wilderness, A thousand miles from you. Last night, where were you? The dawn is dark and I can't see you. Did you ever love me? Or am I just another fool for you? Did you ever love me? Did you ever love me, at all? You set me up, you set me down, loved me up and kicked me down - No love here, just fear of the dark. Did you ever love me? Or am I just another fool for you? Did you ever love me? Did you ever love me, at all?
Play Me Again
If you want me, you’ve got me - Try me, taste and buy me. I feel you when you look at me: A wave swelling over me, Lips swirling over my body. Get me where you want me: Play your game, For your satisfaction, Play me again. Any way you want me: Play the game, For satisfaction, Play me again. I come from faraway seeking a place to play - Heard sirens across the sea but they had no music for me. Then in the crimson dark, I heard magic in your laugh; Your smile unfolded, Bathing me down in your gold. Any way you want me: Play your game, For your satisfaction, Play me again. Get me where you want me: Play the game, For satisfaction, Play me again. I can hear you in your touch, Playing with magic, Warm caresses of my skin - You sweat salt on my tongue; You show me land where there was none. Naked rhythm murmuring, Covering me with you - The naked mystique of you. Get me where you want me: Play your game, For your satisfaction, Play me again. Any way you want me: Play the game, For satisfaction, Play me again.
Naughty Is Best
Someone I know is so naughty, Helping me up in all my glory: Bliss stretching up, touched by the sun - Like a sonic flare, the day has begun. In the inferno, she finds her way, Breathing in great aeons of shapes, Up and down in a fierce embrace, Claiming me. Naughty is best - Your naughty is best. Nicely or naughty - Her naughty is best. Seduced and burned, pulling me closer - Animal instinct sliding on the bed. Vulnerable and deadly, soft and powerful: (Darkly, you draw me) Doom and bliss are both as one. Naughty not nasty - Nasty is ugly, nice is nice, But naughty… is fun… Yeah, naughty is best. Nicely or naughty - Naughty is best. Naughty, naughty, Naughty is best. Waking up at midnight: There’s a clawed monster in my bed, Unleashed, going bump in the night. And on the menu: My life in her hands, Doing what she has to do. She bit me hard; She left her mark; And now I’m naughty. I’m so naughty, Because naughty is best. Naughty, naughty, Naughty is best.
Sweet Salvation
Had some time, had some life, had some fun, and tried to put out some. Love has met me and love has left me - When I’m done, what will come? When I’m done dying, lay my head on the ground; And there’s a simple sign, that I ain’t coming back: I’ll be six feet under ground. Sweet salvation – you know you will be mine; Sweet salvation – you know it’s been a long time. I looked back at those shining eyes - They said: “Listen. Yeah, listen well: Simple things still left to learn, Live your life, Wait your turn.” I asked them, “how, how can I know?” When I’m done dying, lay my head on the ground; And there’s a simple sign, that I ain’t coming back: I’ll be six feet under ground. Sweet salvation – you know you will be mine; Sweet salvation – you know it’s been a long time. “Not yet, go back; see you another time, Soon.” Sweet salvation…
Come Take It All
My bruises glow red hot; My bruises glow red hot; Love me hard or love me not. In time all things come back, Like a spinning wheel - It turns back to where we begin; Read the warning: “Beware!” Do you dare? What do you want from me? Do you want my sin? Do you feel my meaning? It’s where I’ve been; It’s where you’ve been; It’s sweat all over me. I can be what you want to see; I can be big or I can be small - Your choice, come take it all. Come take it all, Come take it all, all, all. Your choice for more poison; I can pretend to be what you hope to see - But what you need is so much more: Be who you are. What do you serve? You receive what you give and get what you deserve; In time, you lose what you steal - Sapped by illusion, dead by exhaustion, Self-gratified, but never satisfied. What do you want from me? Do you want my sin? Do you feel my meaning? It’s where I’ve been; It’s where you’ve been; It’s sweat all over me. I can be what you want to see; I can be big or I can be small - Your choice, come take it all. Come take it all, Come take it all, Come take it all, all, all. What you give comes back to you - Take only when you give your all. Come take it all, Come take it all, Come take it all, all, all, all. What you give comes back to you - So what do you want from me? If you want it all: Come take it all, Come take it all, all, all. Come take it all, come take it all. What do you really need? If you want it all: Come take it all, Come take it all, all, all, all. Come take it all, come take it all…
Out of Your Cage
Late at night in your bed, too tired to sleep, replaying the whole day in my head - Even though you smile, you look at me like you want me dead. Something lingers in the shadows, a distant echo of your voice numbs the air, stirs the nothing; Nothing of nothing: No love, no pain, the numbness again. Out of your cage, Today’s the day I get away; Russian roulette’s not over yet - No risk when I’m already dead. Out of your cage. You hate me now the lock is broken… Time’s up! I’ve had my little hour. But you left me there years ago, as time dripped through the cracks, stuffed and stuck in glue. I escape now to see a sunrise… I want to feel, to feel how I want to feel - To feel my heart beating under a stone. Out of your cage, Today’s the day I get away; Russian roulette’s not over yet - No risk when I’m already dead. Out of your cage - No risk, I’m already dead; I’m already dead. Don’t ask me to plead guilty - Sweat lost in a bottle for cage treats. Not gonna do it no more, Enslaved to a shallow grave. Live or die trying… Live or die trying… Live or die trying. Today’s the day I get away; Today, today I get away - Today! Another day in your bed, Always too tired to sleep, Replaying last night in my head - Even though I smile I feel like I am sleep-talking dead. Something lingers in the shadows: A distant echo of my voice, Numbs the air, stirs the nothing - Nothing of nothing; No love and no pain, The numbness again. Out of your cage, Today’s the day I get away; Russian roulette’s not over yet - No risk when I’m already dead. Out of your cage - No risk, I’m already dead; I’m already dead. Today’s the day I get away… Today.
Do It
All things happen eventually, Slow then slower then fast and suddenly you appear from nowhere - The sparks light up everywhere. You and me, no time like this: One thousand miles starts with a kiss. One thousand miles starts suddenly - Surprise explodes into the air; Into a new day with you; Into one thousand miles for you. The slower the climb, the better the view - For you I’ll start the day (A new first step) With your kiss. One thousand miles starts with your first step, So do it, yeah just do it; Our journey starts right here, right now, So do it, yeah just do it; Start today, start now, start here, right now. One thousand miles - just do it; Yeah, we should do it: One thousand miles starts right now. So do it: A journey of one thousand miles starts with your kiss - So do it, with a kiss. Start each day (A new first step) With your kiss. One thousand miles starts with your first step, So do it, yeah just do it; Our journey starts right here, right now, So do it, yeah just do it; Start today, start now, start here, right now. One thousand miles - just do it; Yeah, we should do it: One thousand miles starts right now. So do it… Yeah, do it… We should Do it.
Growing Young
Everyone is crazy, everyone is sane - Different only by degrees. Anyone is pain, anyone is joy: All things are in all things. We were born, we will cry, we will laugh, And we will die. Our best is yet to come, Everyone is growing young. It takes some time to reach your prime - Don’t turn away, throw your hat in the ring, Just do your thing. Our best is yet to come, Everyone is growing young. Time is the great motivator to live now, not later; Whatever you’re doing, don’t stop, Give it another shot. Everyone is crazy, everyone is sane - Different only by degrees. Anyone is pain, anyone is joy: All things are in all things. Our best is yet to come, Everyone is growing young.
Fake Truth
Fake truth: The gift for you. Paint it gold; put it on your finger and make you sold - The yellow glare for the change of some new clothes. It’s just a natural lie for you, for some big faker, fake-faking you; Faking you, making news with lines to control you. Breaking everything we know is exhausting - Fake truth is same old news, Same old lies spun round for you: Lies, lies, same old lies. So boring, so give me truth; Give me truth, give me truth; Give me The truth, the truth… The Truth. There’s a better view: It’s called “truth”, baby, not aimed to confuse; Not the same old news sunk under mess and confusion, mistrust of the other - Obscuring, misdirecting the mayhem in Dystopian pandemonium. (The great sweaty fakery feeding the crazy-crazy fake-fake fakery.) Breaking everything we know is exhausting - Fake truth is same old news, Same old lies spun round for you: Lies, lies, same old lies. So boring, so give me truth; Give me truth, give me truth; Give me The truth, the truth… The Truth. The same old news is boring banal; Right now, now, now is the real thing - Not some fake sloganised lies, unknown unknowns, dull, impure (fake, fake, fake, fake, fake) fakery - Fake, fake, fake, fake, fake, fake, fake… Fake truth is same old news - Same old lies spun round for you; Spun round for you, for you to die in the lie caught faking you; Fake, faking you: Puny lies, same old lies, faking you.
What I’m Told
The gamble’s the same; The outcome’s a game - Ratios rigged high up to blame. Forever growth; Debt to debt; Interest in interest to forget. Ratios are always the same, but now thousands are billions - Yeah, it all adds up again… In the slime, In the time, It takes to count away… The swamp sucks me back in again. I am so masturbating, Pleasing me daily - It’s all about me, baby: Look at me, me, me, me, me… Yeah, it’s what I’m told. Look at my body; Look at my face - Look at what I’m doing all over the place. Look at me: Fun little me; Dirty little me; Oh, poor little me! I love me; I hate me - “Crazy little me” on my bleeding knees, In the struggle of my troubles, Thoughts bought, Locked in shiny little knots; Written to order for my disorders, Pretending how to live. I am so masturbating, Pleasing me daily - It’s all about me, baby: Look at me, me, me, me, me… Yeah, it’s what I’m told. Another goal, Win or lose, is never as supposed - In the whirlpool of your mind, A palace is a hut, A hut a palace depending on you. I know the games; I know the rules; I know the script you think controls you - Completing what you’ve been told to do, Speaking lines, Being made the fool. Straight in line! The routine of a cold counting machine - What you thought you were supposed to do (Put there years ago), Feeding on you… Feed now on the life for you! I am so masturbating, Pleasing me daily - It’s all about me, baby: Look at me, me, me, me, me… Yeah, it’s what I’m told. It’s what I’m told - Yeah, oh yeah, it’s what I’m told. Let me please you daily - It’s not all about me, baby. Let me help you… I’ll help you with that… Let me please you, maybe.
Melt My Name
Now you’ve got me on the line; Now you’ve got me in the midnight: I hold on like I was in my stride, I was on my ride, And I lie thigh to thigh, And I, I, I comply. You know I saw you in a whole new light - I feel I’m holding onto something after midnight; Outside I lie, strumming back and forth In a shimmering light. Melt my name into the fire; Colour me in desire - Something deadly in your lips Closes in with poison tips… Secret echoes sound in the night; Blue smoke rising at half past midnight; Games of old on repeat In the eye of your red pure heat. Now I lie within your fire, You feel me whole and you hold me light - Closing up, in for the kill, I’ve no chance, come take your fill. Melt my name into the fire; Colour me in desire - Something deadly in your lips Closes in with poison tips… Melt my name… Melt my name… Melt my name in your lips: Melt my name in your lips; Melt my name.
Not Enough
Sometimes a little is a lot; Sometimes cold is hot - You turn me off and turn me on And leave me here, now, Wanting more… I want you. No more! I bark, you bite, It’s too much. Not enough is too much; Not enough is where we begin. Old excuses of the past Rise and fade too fast. One night alone, with you, Is the end starting anew - Chasing you, out of breath, the last time, until the next time… Five thousand miles a day is: Not enough, Not enough - Too much of not enough. “You and me” will never be, And will always be, Not enough.
Come On
Too much for me to know - My heart says yes, but my head says no. Come on, come on, you live inside a screen, not where you belong. Come on, we can try to lose our wires - Know me, hold me. Come on, we’re too slow, staring down at the little blue glow. So you think you know you now, yeah? Tied in pics and shiny chains, yeah? Got to get faraway; Got to get away; From the script, we are taught: We are bought, from year naught. You can do it all, round the long haul, just to crawl around in circles; Or take the chance: A first-class boarding pass. Take the chance, take the big chance; Come on, yeah; Come on, yeah. Got to get faraway; Got to get away; From the script, we are taught: We are bought, from year naught. Yeah, come on, come on - It’s all in the air; It’s all in the air; It’s all in the air; On and on and on and on… Come on now; Come on now; Come on now; Now, now, now, now. Come on, come on yeah; You’ve found me alright - It’s time, hold me, you’ve got me alright. Come on, yeah!
No More Lies
Grinding away another day, But never enough of the same old stuff - Nothing to share in the routine stare. All this time, but time for nothing - Fair play, you'll get your way: A fashion victim, chained to the system, High-rise hypnotised, High-rise metabolised. Time to change for something new - Nothing more, I am through. No more, “not quite here.” No more, I am clear: Not saving for another time - This is now, take my bow. Now, now, I am now. No more lies and no more tries. Same old, “same old”, wants to fool you - More and more trying to control you. Take the last laugh. No more! Close the door. Something in me… Something in me… Something in me… Something in me tells me... Time to change for something new - Nothing more, I am through. No more, “not quite here.” No more, I am clear. Not saving for another time - This is now, take my bow. Now, now, I am now. No more lies and no more tries.
Visiting Time Is Over
Do you know something that I don’t? You want to live but you won’t. Don’t judge who you think I am - Only time with me can bring me back to life. Cure me in the night-time - Only you can help us find the feeling one more time. Nothing lasts too long with the countdown going wrong. Five minutes are up, move on - Nothing to see here. Five minutes are gone, move on, down the line; Visiting time is over. Time is over where you left me - Sent by the bell, back to the cell. Number’s up! Borrowed time returned in silence to the ground; Now I’m just another name, Another face in another place where there’s nothing between us except borrowed time. The alibi of silence: “Another time”. Five minutes are up, move on - Nothing to see here. Five minutes are gone, move on, down the line; Visiting time is over. Time is over where you left me - Sent by the bell, back to the cell. What do I know about me? I’m always hiding; I cannot be seen. It wasn’t over then; I will not falter now - We can climb higher than time. Five minutes are up… Visiting time is over.
Don’t Give Up
Don’t give up, make your luck - Fortune favours those who dare, So don’t give up. Turn up the volume, love what you do, And don’t give up. You are who you are when you Don’t give up. You’re heavy in the darkest day, Weighted down and lost your way - Lighten up your dreams today, And let it all out. All great things just take their time - It’s tough out here up on the climb; Life’s too short for what you’re taught. Don’t give up, make your luck - Fortune favours those who dare, So don’t give up. Turn up the volume, love what you do, And don’t give up. You are who you are when you Don’t give up. Anything can happen, more than you imagine, So live with passion, Let fortune play with you. The future movie of your mind is new and undefined… Life happens when you let it bring… ten thousand things. Don’t give up, make your luck - Fortune favours those who dare, So don’t give up. Turn up the volume, love what you do, And don’t give up. You are who you are when you Don’t give up. Good things are here for you - Don’t give up on you; Keep on going, see it through. Don’t give up Don’t give up Don’t give up on you; Don’t give up Don’t give up Don’t give up on you.
Just Out Of Reach
If you want me let me know, there is more of me to show: In shadows of reflections, lost excuses of deceptions - In sight I hide, Just out of reach… I can’t get away, the past repeats - I can not see in the dark. Through dusk I grind on shattered glass; I try to hide in pride… My mind is: Just out of reach. Mesmerised by the dark, tantalised by fantasies - We don’t have time to wear these clothes: The anxious story urgency, carried memories we live today, (dropped for another way). Just out of reach… I can’t get away, the past repeats - I can not see in the dark. Through dusk I grind on shattered glass; I try to hide in pride… My mind is: Just out of reach. Just out of reach… I can’t get away, the past repeats: Just out of reach… Just out of reach… Just out of reach… Just out of reach… Just out of reach… Just out of reach…
Never Again
Look me in the eye and tell me your lie - Insanity needs feeding. The mirror is cracked - The neon lights are so misleading. Make my crown; Make my frown; Make me cry; Make me sigh; In love; In pain: Nothing to gain but shame. Chase your tail, Reach and fail - Never again, Never again. You bring the storm; You bring thunder - But never again. The meaning of life is to live: Love in the moment, with every breath; Holding on for dear life, to each other - Words silenced with a kiss. Chase your tail, Reach and fail - Never again, Never again. You bring the storm; You bring thunder - But never again. Never again.
Everything’s Bigger in Texas
Driving down highway eighty, There was something hard to miss: Just one star in the sky, shining down on me. At the end of the line, I saw a big old sign, politely reminding me: In the land of the free, from sea to shining sea, Everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas... From the sound of my guitar, to the smiles that I meet, to the stomp of the feet, to the rhythm for company, to the hospitality… Yeah, I stayed around 'til breakfast, and in my dreams I made that day, I had my independence day. Because everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas. Although I was just passing through, I roamed on by the country; The sky was turquoise blue, A warm haze rose to the heavens; And I saw the sunset on the prairie; And it was something real tremendous, Because everything's bigger in Texas. Yeah, everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas. Everything's bigger in Texas.
Here Without You
Feeling the way the river flows, the way the wind blows - It goes right through me… Am I here, in someone else's dream? Do I exist at all, here without you? It came to me like a thunder cloud in blue to be told we are through - It crashed right into me. But still I hope for you; I'll always feel for you; I'll long for you, over and over… Here without you. Why do I hunger and need you so? Because I'm me, Because of you (of you!) Why do I hunger and need you so? Because I've always loved you… I love you. Why do I hunger here all alone? Because I've always loved you… I love you.
Somehow
The touch of rain kisses the pain of you. To the bitter end, I will always be your friend. There's nothing I can do, Nowhere to be with you. On a hope and a prayer, On the edge of nowhere, I see you here in everything I do. I know I lost somehow - Before you took your vow, I knew that time would carry you away. Winter draws on but still I hold on, To thoughts of you - Somehow, Somewhere, My heart is lost in time… I felt you here somehow; I knew you knew somehow; I feel for you in everything I do. I must leave you now, somehow. I need you to know: Somehow, Somehow, I felt you here - Somehow, I knew you knew; Somehow, I must leave you now… Somehow. Somehow.
I Just Miss You
Your train had vanished down the track, left me there, not looking back. All I see ahead of me are seasons of mists numbing me, to the core - because you're not here anymore. I just miss you; I really miss you; Love finds a way, through summer and winter… Over mountains faraway, Is the song of you. I'll find the way; I'll find you some day… In a warm calm sea, Kissed by the dance of the sun, Is the lost dream of you. I just miss you; I really miss you; Love finds a way, through summer and winter… Over mountains faraway, Is the song of you. I have long missed you; I have fallen short of you. Every day is the same, looking through the rows of faces, in the old familiar places. I just miss you; I really miss you; Love finds a way, through summer and winter… Over mountains faraway, Is the song of you.
April Fool
I'm just a little soul, part of a bigger goal; Just give me somebody to hold. Said the fool: I've a world to rule - Poisoned flower's scent turned sour; Beauty within me bloomed and faded so fast. April fool, another broken rule; The sky is on the floor for this poor April fool. Even if the sun were bright, the day for us has faded to night; But the light now turns round and round… I'm falling in time with you again and again, once more. Put my body in your hands - Please don't try to understand (I'm twisted round and round.) I was always the April fool - April fooled, always the April fool. April fool, another broken rule; The sky is on the floor for this poor April fool. April fool, another broken rule; The sky is on the floor for this poor April fool. Another April fool; Another April fool; Fool, fool, April fool.
Night Eyes
I am absent without leave in ways you can’t perceive. Bail me out, show me what I am about: All hard and cold, of fool’s gold, in fool's paradise. Show me what you are about. Show me what I must do: What we must do; What you can do… You are the night eyes when I escape behind closed eyes. Tonight, with love, we know I am here with you. You are Night Eyes; I see tonight, Night Eyes, With you. You've been waiting, anticipating, what I have to say. You told me: More fool me; There was always, always more to see. But I misunderstood, “A little bit of what you fancy does you good.” Ok, I'll be as good as gold - Forever waiting’s over, over, over. You are the night eyes when I escape behind closed eyes. Tonight, with love, we know I am here with you. You are Night Eyes; I see tonight, Night Eyes, With you.
Better Late Than Never
I know I should have been here long ago, but I lost my way; I lost my mind in circles around you; I'm sorry, so sorry. Maybe it was just another story about us, with words that swirl around you and me - Better late than never. You don't know I've been sinking in the moments of fear that hurt us; Fear stopped us, I lost us; I'm sorry, so sorry. I was out of sight, out of mind, miles behind, without a trace, fallen from grace - Better late than never together. Better late than never; In the end, we are together - Through time we find love is forever. Better late than never; Better together; Out of time we find love is forever; Together forever - Better late than never.
Be Now
Everything can come to those who live and won't wait: Something good, something great - Yeah, I’m not in control. Rise and shine, everything's fine; You're all good, be as it should - Be now: The rub of the green, with no routine… Be now. Less is so much more; It hits home here, to the core - A bolt from the blue. Now I know, I know how to be, you free me; Only now I am me - You free me, I am me. Rise and shine, everything's fine; You're all good, be as it should - Be now: The rub of the green, with no routine… Be now. Love lives inside me, never asleep, alive and forever, you’re more than skin deep; I will never ever get lost; I am here and now forever… Now I know, I know how to be: You free me… Be now.
Only Love Is Real
I need to find some peace of mind - I watch the ride: A thousand eyes shining in space, In the beauty of you. Only love is real… I am now awake With where my heart is now - Now in life: Only you, Only you are real… Only love is real to me. Life is what you make - Drop the story; The past is what you make, Right now. Be something new Beyond yourself; In the moment, Only love is real. Only love is real to me - Only you. Only you are real to me: Only love is real. Intimate together, Love lasts forever - One heart never apart. Only love, Only you, Only you are real to me. Only love is real.
This Too Will Pass
Slipping and sliding, Commanding the tides - Bitter struggling against my mind. But nothing can last, This too will pass. Minds crashing and colliding - Anxiety, when dreaming away, Ignoring the lights. Night turns to day, day turns to night… The future's the past. Nothing ever lasts. (This too will pass.) In the stillness and the storm, Victory’s glowing so strong; It sinks down in the dark, Rising up to start again, To rust away again - To dust. In the end, Through pain and beauty, beauty and pain: Only love remains. No thing ever lasts; The past’s the past. Stories end, new dreams begin - Only love remains, Only love remains. Love moves the wind; Nothing stays the same - Floating away, away… With the end of the day: Only love remains, Only love remains.
Our Way Back
Our way back is to where we were before, before we started - Where it's taken a lifetime for us to be together… Where we departed. I’ve been a dark horse running from the source to the back of beyond, on an uneven course - Where every lost cloud was a memory of my way back to you. Our way back is there forever in our soul - Where I breathe with you; Where dreams are always true. Tell me now, What do you want me to do? I know that we can be together, Where forever is our soul; Our way back is forever in our soul. Our love is our way back.
Between The Lines
I am here now for your pleasure, Light me up, I'm at your leisure - You don't know what I am thinking; You don't know that I am winking. The illusion: An old delusion, found again and lost again. I just missed you, How I missed you! I'm the secret hiding from you. See between the lines: See the signs, all around you. Today is our time: Sleepy sunshine, Above and beyond, Between the lines. Know that I see you like no other - I am more than just your lover. I am not just going somewhere - I am here through time and back again… I am not a number, I live in wonder now - You know I found it out somehow, Shining in the faces, Turning over all my pages. See between the lines: See the signs, all around you. Feel between the lines: Feel the signs, all around you. See between the lines: See the signs, all around you; Feel the signs, all around you. Today is our time: Sleepy sunshine, Above and beyond, Between the lines.
It Can’t Be You
You entered, in my mind, so long ago, so long ago - Even though you were a passing shadow unlikely for me to see again. Sometimes I’d see you in my mind: I’d think of what you were doing, what you were seeing, what you were imagining - You were an unnamed figure floating through my mind. I saw you again the other day In an unexpected place. You answered all my questions, But how can I feel like this? It can’t be you… It can’t be you… It can’t be you. How can this happen, here and now? Before I’ve even started, I know how far I’ve got to go… And each day is harder than the one before because I can’t reach you. I saw you again the other day In an unexpected place. You answered all my questions, But how can I feel like this? It can’t be you… It can’t be you… It can’t be you.
Another Thing Coming
Through the window I could see a glimmering gaze waiting for me - A choice, in the noise: Light from afar or delight at the bar. One more day mind glazed; One more day in the shade; One more day of empty glasses; One more day for second chances - Fear stained memories in a cage, forgotten feelings in a haze, cold and shrill and numbing: Another thing coming… So time for home, time for bed, too many words have been said; Cold relief, short and brief, turning tables, writing labels, making time to switch (which is which?) One more day mind glazed; One more day in the shade; One more day of empty glasses; One more day for second chances - Fear stained memories in a cage, forgotten feelings in a haze, cold and shrill and numbing: Another thing coming… Now you’ve set me up in the middle of some good luck, with the myth: The iron gate of an altered state - Myself withheld from all my sins, falling down on the sharpened ground. The night-time cure, the magic mixture, the mystery - Your special power shimmers in a night-shine, a potion of lost emotion reflecting a fantasy in my head. One more day mind glazed; One more day in the shade; One more day of empty glasses; One more day for second chances - Fear stained memories in a cage, forgotten feelings in a haze, cold and shrill and numbing: Another thing coming…
Words and (some) Music by Robert Walker
A Song Within
Battles closing minds at war; Fights the same, just as before. Raging struggles in your way, surviving another day of artificial, unsubstantial Fears full of the end. A song within is for display - Play it now, play it loud, play it soft; But most of all: Love it all. “Them and us, us and them” makes it easy to condemn - Red in tooth and claw does not have to be the law; Anger bathed in fear only makes another tear. Take another step, the next step, for all. A song within is for display - Play it now, play it loud, play it soft; But most of all: Love it all. Listen to the whisper, quiet and small: Light belongs to all - But most of all: Love it all.
Blah De Blah
Tedium… Tedious conversation… Boring repeats, heard it all before: Blah de blah, boring blah blah, “How dare you, what about me?” Blah blah, blah de blah blah, boring, blah blah blah. The same look in the eyes, the same scripted replies: “I’m better than, I’m more than” – comparison of facades. Seeking, needing the outrage; fanning the flames, finding someone to blame. Taught behaviour, taught script: “Look at me! Aren’t I special. Give me a biscuit!” “My happy versus your happy;” “Aren’t I special because I conform.” (Spoon fed some rules.) Blah de blah, boring blah blah, “How dare you, what about me?” Blah blah blah, blah de blah blah, boring, blah blah blah. “Everybody must have the same opinion” - Nobody knows everything, even about one thing: The more I see the less I know; the more I see the more I feel. Explanations unfold, change colour and disappear into space - The enormity and hugeness of limitless space… Blah de blah, boring blah blah, “How dare you, what about me?” Blah blah, blah de blah blah, boring, blah blah blah. No need to be imprisoned by a side, by a tribe - Each day is different, rules are for machines. Exceptions are for you. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Jack (in HW: HIBPM)
You don’t play the ball. You kick the bastard in the balls. Or better still, get someone else to do it.
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I’m off to fart my way around a golf course with fat balding men.
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Walks past pictures of PMs … “Bitch, bitch, bitch – see you later, bitches.”
Robert Walker 